Actually my friends, this is not a rant from me. This is the work of my sister Kim. For those of you who don't know her, maybe some background will help.
Kim is 2 years younger than me. If you are familiar with the personality types she is a Sanguine all the way. She is incredibly intelligent, and puts up with very little crap. Which goes without saying, is a dangerous combination for those who try to dish it out to her. I found this on her facebook page and felt compelled to share it with the world.
And yes, Kim is one of my heros. After reading her rant, she may very well be one of yours. Enjoy.
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I had a credit card issued by a company that shall remain nameless. I was, in my own mind, a decent customer. I always paid on time, far more than the minimum due. Until, one day last summer, my bill got lost. I was late by a week or so and my interest rate SPIKED from 11.99% to 28.99%. No, you didn't read wrong. I REALLY SAID TWENTY EIGHT POINT NINETY NINE PERCENT. Outrageous, right?
I dealt for a few months, and last month managed to get the bill paid in full. Today, I received a March bill for $67.71! Silly me, I thought I was done with my full and final payment. I forgot to consider the interest charged from the time the bill was issued to the time paid. UGGGH. Frustrating to say the least, but makes at least a modicum of sense. Pissed me off to no end though.
So I called them. I told them I was a little outraged. I asked how much I actually had to send them to ensure that I would not be sent ANOTHER innane bill for interest on interest. I asked them how long I'd have to pay interest on interest on interest and stressed that I needed to be free of them. I may have called them villians also. Perhaps. Probably. Repeatedly? Okay, repeatedly. Corrupt, contemptuous, nefarious, and wicked also.
I may have told them that hiking interest rates to damn near thirty percent is the reason for the state of the American economy. (I understand that's not entirely true, but I was mad. It plays its own special role. My girl Suze Orman will tell you the same).
The bored sounding woman with her lovely Indian accent estimated a number that I should send to avoid further interest charges. I was very tempted to rant about American unemployment and outsourcing jobs, but managed to bit my tounge. That was painful, seeing as I'd burned it on too hot coffee earlier in the evening...
I told her I'd send a check in the morning and would like to close my account "Right now at this very minute, and not a moment later!"
She transferred me to customer service.
Bank Customer Service Representative: "How can I help you"
Kim: "I'd like to close my account"
Bank Customer Service Representative: "May I ask you why?"
Kim: "You most certainly may. My interest rate, after years of being with your company, has spiked to 28.00%. I find this abominable and it should be illegal. Business practices such as these are responsible for the state of the American economy and you people should be ashamed of yourself. Furthermore, I received a bill after thinking I'd zeroed out my account and am mad about that. Now I understand that you are simply the middleman hired to do very little more than answer the phone and placate people, and as such I'm not going to get TOO nasty with you. I also understand that it is your job to convince me to keep my account open. Let me tell you now: no matter what you do, you cannot convince me to do such a thing. You can lower my interest to three percent and give me a sixteen thousand dollar credit limit, and I'll still close the account. So please don't waste your breath or my time and just close the account."
(I wish I could convey my tone. It's always about the tone. I like to think I'm scary. Some of you have seen me this way and would probably agree.)
She gave me her mandatory blurb about how to re-open should I choose to do so (at which point I rudely talked over her and told her I would only do so in a fit of insanity). Upon hanging up the phone, I got out my checkbook to end this for good.
Not to be redundant, but the memo on my check reads: "You people are crooks and villians and should be ashamed of hiking rates to 28.99%. You are the reason for this recession and I hope it haunts your dreams."
Just for my own personal satisfaction, I used pink gel pen. I'm not entirely sure how accurate this is, but I was once told that for any document to be legally binding, it must be signed in blue or black ink. I love to be slightly passive agressive. It's good for the soul (or at the very least, the ego). Come to think of it, there might be an argument for some people's souls being comprised solely of their egos! Alas, philosophical ponderings for another rant...
I made a note on the statement that I had included another three dollars in my check "AS TO AVOID EVER HEARING FROM YOU CROOKS AGAIN".
Then, I addressed it to "The Crooks at: ---------- Bank" (Name omitted to prevent acusations of slander. If you want to know the name of the bank, I'll tell you in a private message.).
Then, I drew an arrow pointing to the return address and wrote "Be careful starting an account with this company. They are devious..."
On the back, I drew an arrow to the return address and wrote "Villians who like to hike interest rates to 29% and are (partially) responsible for the state of our economy. To all postal workers who handle this correspondence: tread carefully with this company!"
Now I don't really feel better. The only real way to feel better is to blog about it (obviously). No, seriously, sometimes a good rant is good for the egotistical soul.
But my question is this: are my exterior envelope rantiings actually slanderous? What a minute thing to consider and/or worry about, right? People get sued for stranger things.
I guess, all in all, I feel lucky that I'm able to be done with it and not one of the poor folks who will actually be haunted by such unfathomable interest (Thanks to one amazing fiance who decided he'd like to take care of the bill in full, minus $67.71, of which no one had premonition).
End rant. Thanks for playing...
